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Babywearing

Rachel Rainbolt, M.A., CEIM
www.OhanaWellness.com

I was once asked what parenting tool I found most valuable.  My answer is babywearing.  I find babywearing to be the most valuable tool for parenting because of all the abundant benefits to parent and baby and because of the lifestyle you find yourself in when you embrace wearing your baby. 

It is so interesting to me when people ask about this new or alternative parenting style.  Parents have been wearing their babies for centuries.  Strollers are the new, alternative invention.  Women all over the world wear their babies every day, as did their mothers and grandmothers.  Wearing your baby provides a feeling of completeness.  You know I love following your innate wisdom as a mother and do you not feel that sense of completeness when baby is pressed against your chest?  Carrying or babywearing meets a baby's needs for physical contact, affection, security, stimulation, and movement (all of which encourage neurological development) while on the go.

What is it?
In response to me telling a therapist friend that I practice babywearing, she replied, "What is that?  You wear a scarf made out of babies?  That is really messed up Rachel."  Of course, she was joking.  But  the truth was that even this intelligent, well-educated, well-meaning, helper of families was so unfamiliar with the concept that I may as well have been talking about wearing scarves made out of babies.  To wear your baby means to carry her, to hold her on your body.  It's really that simple.  To get all these amazing benefits, all you have to do is hold your baby.  With the addition of a sling or carrier to the equation, babywearing not only makes all the tenants of attachment parenting easier but life in general!  Make the sling part of your daily wardrobe, pop baby in, and live your life.  Voila- babywearing.

Why?
Babywearing gives mom freedom!  So many parents out there think they have to choose: sit cozy in a chair and rock your baby on your chest and breastfeed or strap baby to a chair venture out into the world- but what if baby wants to nurse?  What if he gets cold?  What if he demands to be held and then how will you push the stroller and open doors? 

Babywearing gives you the freedom to have it all!  Baby is snuggled close, safe and cozy, rhythmically moving, can breastfeed anytime with privacy all while mom has 2 free hands, complete mobility, and gets to be connected to the outside world!  You are less dependent on things like car seat carriers, cribs, and swings.  The entire world becomes a safe haven for baby- you are home, not house is home.   Really think about that.  You can do anything and go anywhere if you are home to baby.   You are now free to go out!  Home is where mother is, no reason mother has to be stuck at home.  Babies in slings are quiet and content so they are society-friendly.  Bring them out to dinner, take baby to that office party, you are now set up to live a truly family-integrated lifestyle.  Even traveling need not be feared (unfamiliar sights and sounds are not frightening, easier transitions, close by (no wandering)).

Have a baby who cries (rhetorical question- all babies cry sometimes).  Then babywearing is your savior because it calms baby.  One study found that compared to a control group of babies whose parents were not given a free sling and encouraged to babywear, they cried 43% less!  Also, in cross cultural studies of other cultures where babies are worn all the time, long periods of crying are unheard of.  One of the culprits for crying is disorganization (of the nervous system).  Infant Massage helps regulate this and so does babywearing.  It promotes organization by teaching babies how to be content, in large part because it mimics the womb (swaddling, heartbeat, temp regulation, nutrition right there, rythmic motion, booming voice, not alone).  Fans of The Happiest Baby on the Block program should love babywearing.  If getting baby down for bedtime is a challenge in your home, try "wearing down".  Just wear baby, live your life, he will fall asleep, remove yourself from the sling and place him in bed.  

Babywearing promotes learning in all aspects of development.  Babies learn about the world from the carrier.  They see what mom sees, hear what dad hears, and experience mom and dad's reaction to the stimuli.  Babywearing enhances speech development.  Worn babies are right at mouth and eye level.  They are right there, involved in all your conversations.  Before you know it, they are even including themselves. 

Babywearing makes you a better and more successful parent.  One example is improved attentiveness.  In one study moms were given a sling or infant seat.   Carrying moms were more attentive at postpartum and 13 months and infants were more securely attached.  Another example is improved breastfeeding success.   Wearing your baby in a sling makes breastfeeding easier, makes discreet nursing easier, satisfies the frequent nurser, organizes problem suckers (gets them in the right position and relaxed), and helps the slow-to-gain-weight baby.  Babywearing makes home management easier.  You can get all your household stuff done even though sometimes baby is just not happy anywhere but in the arms of mom or dad.  Put baby in the carrier and wash the dishes, fold the laundry, vacuum the floors (babies are especially soothed by this one- try it!).  Trying to be a great mom to baby and an older sibling?  Babywearing gives you the freedom to give your hands and attention to big sister.  Another great example is work and wear: work while mothering.  These two things do not need to be mutually exclusive.  You can contribute to the world in positive and meaningful ways while being a devoted parent.  One of the most important benefits for some mothers is that babywearing helps overcome Postpartum Depression (PPD).  

In summary, research supports the benefits of babywearing.  Like with infant massage, the power of nurturing touch involved in babywearing tunes you in to your little one and results in reduced crying, improved breastfeeding rates, improved sleep, reduced incidence of plagiocephaly (flat head syndrome), better attachment and improved parental responsiveness.  Evidence-based benefits for full term babies include improved state organization and motor system modulation; improved temperature regulation; and an analgesic effect, reduced crying, improved maternal responsiveness, and babies who were more securely attached.  Preterm babies especially have been shown to receive marked benefits from babywearing including shortened hospital stay, decreased illness, higher exclusive breastfeeding rates/longer breastfeeding duration, increased weight gain, improved temperature regulation, and improved maternal sense of competence.

How?
Try, try, try again.  Like breastfeeding, babywearing takes some work at the beginning to get the hang of it.  If I had a nickel for every time I was stopped while wearing my baby out in the world and told, "Wow, that looks amazing.  I wish I could have that.  I was given a Baby Bjorn for my shower but it hurt my back." or "Wow, that looks amazing.  I wish I could have that but my baby didn't like it.  I think her legs were uncomfortable."  (or something to these extents).  I had to try many styles, types, and brands before I found the perfect carriers for me and my babies.  And it took practice to get the hang of using each one.  But once you make it over the hump, there is bliss on the other side.  Don't be intimidated and don't quit!  Get recommendations from other like-minded parents.  This is important- other like-minded parents.  You may have a lot of friends who you like and have a lot of history with who occasionally use a Baby Bjorn and tell you to get one but look for role models around you.  If you see a mom loading groceries in her cart while reading a list with her older son and as you get closer notice she is even breastfeeding too- ask her about her sling!  I am frequently asked about my tools for babywearing.  I take it as a compliment each and every time.  Go shopping!  Every store that sells slings has models to try on.  Stores like the Babies in Bloom and Babies by the Sea Boutique have people there to give you all the help you need.  My favorite carriers are Baby K'tan for newborns and Ergo Baby as he gets heavier and needs more support.  There are many other types (ring sling, mei tai, structured carrier, moby wrap, etc.) and brands.  And for each type of carrier there are numerous position options for baby.

Correct Positioning:

• If you put your arms around your baby, they should be in a same position as if you were holding them outside the sling/carrier.
• Your baby’s face should be visible to you.
• You should be able to kiss the top of your baby’s head.

Special note just for dads: If there is one piece of advice I could give dads it would be to wear your baby.  You can't grow your baby inside your body for 9 months and you can't breastfeed.  Babywearing is your ticket into the securely attached world of your baby.  It is an external womb.  It is your way to nurse, soothe, bond, know your baby and your baby can get to know you.  Tip for success: get your own carrier.  What works perfectly for my 5'5" inch frame did not work perfectly for my 6'1" husband.  Plus... my Baby K'tan was pink.  For his first Father's Day, skip the tie and get him a carrier.    

A couple weeks after the birth of my son I was invited to a party for a colleague.  I arrived at the party, baby in sling, and no one even realized I had my baby with me until a good friend arrived, excited to meet new little Bailey Sage, and ran over to me squealing, "Oh my god, is he in there?!"  Then after pulling back the fabric and peeking in at my breastfeeding newborn she exclaimed, "Oh my god, you are breastfeeding right now?!"  All of the women nearby came over and wanted to learn all about how I was mingling while holding a breastfeeding newborn.  At the time I was just confused.  Why wouldn't I bring my baby?  Why wouldn't I breastfeed?  I was just doing what felt right.  I was happy.  Bay was happy.  All my colleagues at the party were happy.  I have so many stories like this one: dancing at weddings (baby in sling), professional meetings (baby in sling), adventuring in the outdoors or the urban village, or going out with my husband (baby in sling).  I've received nothing but pleasant surprise, warm reception, and genuine support from everyone I've come across.  My husband and I are happy, my babies are happy, and we are all free together... complete.

Babywearing
 

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Soothing Slumber Video
Infant Massage for Nighttime

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• Nighttime Harmony Article
• Worksheet